I am so frustrated with the system that is supposed to "help" during tough times.

I've been keeping it to myself, but my final straw has been snapped. I lost my job last year, and thus my health insurance. My ex-husband hasn't worked since April of last year and his insurance was finally termed at the end of Sept. 08. I have spent that entire time working my way through the redtape to get some assistance with healthcare for the kids. Today, I got the final denial letter. I just bought a private plan so the kids can have insurance. I thought these programs were in place to help the people that needed them. Guess not. My unemployment amount raises our income above the need level for regular medicaid and because I share my rent expense, the other program feels justified in trying to obtain my roommates income documentation, despite the fact that he has no financial obligation to support my kids or pay their healthcare costs. Pretty freaking cool if you ask me.

Now I get to pony up $200 per month for insurance. Luckily, I'm smart enough to plan ahead and have about 5 months in premiums in savings, I just would have prefered that the system work as it was intended obviously. Perhaps that makes me part of the problem. But if the kids of two unemployed parents don't qualify for assistance, there is seriously something wrong. Especially when I fall well below the poverty level despite my unemployment and meger child support. Wonder if my insurance payments make me qualify for food stamps now. Not that I want them. But wouldn't that be ironic? I guess I'm back to my stubborn "I'll do it myself" attitude. But I sure am sick of playing by the rules and getting screwed everytime I try to make the rules work for me.

And before anybody says it, yes I am complaining about state medicaid programs. And yes, I did in fact just buy a new washer and dryer set. (Can you tell this has already been thrown in my face?) However, the cost of the new washer/dryer set is between $500-800 less than what I would have spent this year alone on lugging it all to the laundromat. I make my investments very carefully and with a lot of thought, despite what others may think.

Alright, I've gotta get off here and go adjust my budget worksheets with this new expense. Overplanning has its perks I guess.